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one of my poems i made

Discussion in 'Arts' started by steel, Apr 13, 2009.

  1. steel

    steel n00b

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    ok ive been told im a poet can some one tell me what they think:
    in the devils lair we burn in hell
    the pain of it like a witches spell
    no matter how loud u holler or yell
    you'll never escape that firery hell
     
  2. Charismatic_Caterpie

    Charismatic_Caterpie Professional Gamer

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    Get a day job.
     
  3. Ezio

    Ezio Hardcore/Retarded gamer

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    Eh it was all right for how short it was but make your poems longer and flow better and you could have something.
     
  4. aboutMe

    aboutMe Guest

    wat i thought about that poet is noafense by it is :???: but u can do better
     
  5. DarkStar

    DarkStar Banned

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    in the devils lair we burn in hell
    the pain of it like a witches spell
    no matter how loud u holler or yell
    you'll never escape that firery hell


    Howabout.

    In the devils lair we burn in hell
    The pain of it a witches spell
    NO matter when you holler or yell
    youll neve...ur doin it rong!


    Fail.
     
  6. mrmystic

    mrmystic MoreAkwardthanaJewateastr

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    You guys are soooo mean.
    I find "holler" to be perfectly poetic language...
    Almost like that one poet, he was famous..
     
  7. steel

    steel n00b

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    excuse me but r u saying that its any good
     
  8. Charismatic_Caterpie

    Charismatic_Caterpie Professional Gamer

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    No, he's lightheartedly mocking you. It's all in good spirits.
     
  9. Zeusy

    Zeusy The Surreal Love Bastard

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    niccccccceeeee
     
  10. steel

    steel n00b

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    oh well its better than some other things ive heard
     

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